Today a friend posted on Facebook the joys of living the giant merry-go-round life with 4 children. . . . picking up the kitchen floor, living room floor, toy room floor, bathroom floor, then doing it all over again and again. Tonight, as I washed dishes with a cold spaghetti noodle between my toes, I wondered what is that healthy balance that allows me to keep the house clean, spend time with my kids and most-wonderful husband, and have some time to myself? Is wanting to SHOWER so bad? It's some magical combination that completely eludes me. I remember watching Oprah before I had children, thinking those women who had to have a clean house before they could take the kids to the park were crazy! Get out with the kids already, who cares if the house is a mess?!! I went so far as to discuss with Shaun the fact that I wanted our whole house to be a "playroom" for the kids--nothing off-limits, everything fun. I even had the whole science room figured out, complete with little terrariums for bugs and creatures. Fast-forward: HELLO--was I missing a part of my brain? I didn't have a CLUE. I CARE if the house is a mess, because now I have 3 toddlets who perpetually tear it up quicker than I can register the holy mess in my brain to stop them. *And there is NO WAY I'll ever have little boxes filled with dirt and bugs in my house.* Bear in mind the tsunami doesn't end at my bedroom door either. Oh no. It just breaks the door down and rushes right on in. The kids have been known to run around with my "wooba pads" (translation: bras) on their heads to play "bugs" while Boo's most favorite activity is to empty out all of my dresser drawers. Is nothing sacred? Now I realize that order is a NECESSITY to my sanity, but at the same time there is no way I can constantly maintain it without giving up other important things in a day. Who wants to miss out snuggling, imagining, loving, and laughing with their sweet little ones while they are little? And who doesn't need a Jillian Michaels torture session to get that energy up to deal with it all, as well as spiritual upliftment so you don't spank the heck out of those aforementioned "sweet little ones?" I want it all--the clean house, fun times with the kids and dates with the man, sveldt body, spiritual growth, fridge stocked with food, callings magnified, clean car, notes to grandma. . . .you get the picture. But is it important to have it all? Is it REALISTIC to have it all? All you seasoned and wise women, is there a secret to this perfect balance? (Bear in mind I am NOT a 5 a.m. girl, nor am I
THIS.) Now, while you ponder my dilemma I am off to vacuum the shredded cheese in the carpet. Then, maybe I'll shower unless I'm too tired. Who cares anyways, S-man is out of town. I'll be back soon looking for good advice!
7 comments:
ummmm... no advice, just an AMEN, sistah!
Lori - you are such fun to read! I wish you all lived right next door so we could giggle about our kids stunts together. It is hard to find balance, isn't it? I loved Sister Beck's talk on the Saturday Session of General Conference - we want to much to do everything and do it well. You are so right about taking the time with our kids - I have to remind myself so often! Thanks so much!
Lori...no real advice because I'm looking for it too. I'll tell myself NOT to pick up after them everytime they destroy the house while they're napping but then I somehow end up doing it. So often I feel I'm cleaning or cooking all the times and I miss out playing with them as they "demend" around me. Its like I'm on a seesaw by myself, if I'm on this side and the other side will be upside down. I guess I can never do it the way I WANT IT and have to give and take,eh... Gotta remind myself--I'm doing the best I can! Just love your writing and miss chatting with you in person.
I feel dizzy too! I'm trying to stretch all I want to accomplish in a day into a week- ha! It's still so hard. I tidy the house every day because I want to live in a tidy house, but somedays that's all I do and that's no fun either- ugh!
just loved this blog post beacause I feel it too.
No good advice here. Sometimes I struggle just to maintain my sanity. I have decided that with each child, I have had to let a little more go(at least the clean house part). Since my 4th is about 7 weeks away, I think I will be saying goodbye to even more very shortly. Just know that I think every mom feels the same way you do.
I so remember feeling this way! And I don't know what to tell you--just do the best you can to keep some sort of balance between fun kid time, somewhat clean house, time with hubby, etc. I don't know if I ever felt like I balanced it all well--or if I did, it was fleeting and usually an illusion! But before you know it they'll be grown and you'll have the house to yourself...with hubby of course! That's why it's essential to keep that relationship strong--because at the end of the day, he's who's still living with you! Hang in there all you strong, beautiful moms--you're doing great things!
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