Thursday, April 29, 2010

What are you lookin' at?

We usually reserve Sundays for church, family time, and a fine meal any grandma would be proud of.  This Sunday was no exception.  I went to Costco, scored a plump bird, and couldn't wait to feast on it's marinated juiciness whilst my husband raved on and on about my culinary skillz!  That is, until I opened the package and found this:

My precious, impressionable daughter was helping in the kitchen, all innocent in her apron until she saw real-life spread out before her.  Hovering between fascination and sheer horror she emphatically proclaimed "I WILL NOT eat it's privates Mom!!"  Fair enough.  I wouldn't either, although it would be fun to see Shaun have a go at them.

I got over the trauma of decapitating clucky with my kitchen shears, rubbed him down with seasoning, and plopped him in the oven.  An hour and a half later we were good to go, the cluckster was nicely browned and smelling fine, and Sunday dinner was BACK in all it's glory, and quite good I might add. 

Then, Shaun went and ruined it for all of us.  Upon the final dissection of the bird, he found these tucked neatly inside:

It's. . . THE CLAW!!

After enduring my husband's tirade concerning chickens, scratching claws, and poop, I was quite certain clucky was about to make a reappearance at the porcelain throne.  Needless to say, he will not be gracing our Sunday table ever, EVER again.  Sorry Grandma.  Sweet husband dearest, do you want the left-overs for lunch?? 


Jennifer said...

You do have the culinary skillz! Once during our first year in Taiwan we had some friends over who wanted to cook for us, but their kitchen was too small so we had them over to our place (how could we resist, I don't have the culinary skillz). Anyway, they brought 2 chickens (just like Clucky), and prepared 1 of them deliciously and left the other one for us in our freezer. Yeah, we never cooked the other one. After a year on ice, we just chucked him. Good for you in going for it! I love reading your blog, you're so witty!

Gustogirl said...

You are brave. If I opened a package of chicken and anything in it had eyes, I would probably throw the whole thing away.

The Johnsons said...

I can also attest to your culinary skillz as I was a benefactor of them many times! Thank you again. I also want to comment on your writing skillz. The way you phrase things makes it even more enjoyable!! I was cracking up about that chicken. But if you didn't eat the meat off the feet then you were missing the best part right!

Michelle said...

Your courage is inspiring. I'm glad you warned me about the claws. Just in case...